


Saying Good-bye

by franscats



Category: The Sentinel (TV)
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-12-23
Updated: 2019-12-23
Packaged: 2021-02-25 22:20:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,725
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21922798
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/franscats/pseuds/franscats
Summary: Blair moves to Los Angeles with his fiancee but can't stop thinking about JIm.
Relationships: Jim Ellison/Blair Sandburg
Comments: 4
Kudos: 26
Collections: 2019 'The Sentinel Secret Santa' - Extravaganza





	Saying Good-bye

**Author's Note:**

> This was done for the Secret Santa Extravaganza.

**Part One - Blair**

Blair Sandburg walked into his small Los Angeles apartment and reaching out on his right turned on the overhead light. He automatically moved to put his keys in a basket by the door but stopped remembering the keys belonged in the basket of a loft he had once lived in – in Cascade.

Shaking his head at the habit he had yet to break he glanced over the mail he had carried in. There were two bills and three Christmas cards, one addressed in Jim Ellison’s neat hand. Dropping the other mail, he eagerly ripped open the envelope and smiled at the small note in the card. “Hi Blair,” it read. “Hope all is well in LA. Life in Cascade is pretty much the way it was when you left. Simon paired me with Joel for a case that needed a bit of extra attention and all the stuff you showed Joel helped. Hope you and Jennifer are doing well together and have a wonderful holiday.”

Blair slowly put the card down and sighed thinking he should be there supporting and protecting Jim. “When you left,” he said out loud. Five months ago after showing Joel how to help Jim focus when he used his senses, Blair had moved to LA. At the time, he had been dating Jennifer Fenton. Jennifer was a brilliant and funny mathematician and Blair had gone so far as to buy her an engagement ring after five months of steady dating. Then she had accepted a position as a professor at Cal Tech and asked Blair to go with her.

Torn between the desire to stay in Cascade with Jim and go with Jennifer he had no clue what to do but Jim had convinced him to go. “If this is the lady you want to start a family with than you have to go and give it a chance.”

Blair had known what Jim said was true, or partially true. Yes, a family would be nice but not if it meant losing Jim. As much as he loved Jennifer, in his heart of hearts he carried a secret. He loved Jim more (and not just brotherly love) but knowing Jim was straight Blair knew the relationship he truly wanted would never happen.

Blair had moved to LA renting a small furnished apartment with a month to month lease while they established their lives there. To make things easier, Blair had taken a leave from Cascade while considering where he would go to finish his doctorate and had accepted a teaching assistant position at a small college in LA.

Then two months ago, over dinner, Jennifer looked at Blair with watery eyes and pulled off the engagement ring. “What?” he asked softly as she placed the ring down on the table.

“I care about you Blair,” she whispered. “I really do but I met up with my old boyfriend and I realized I still love him.”

Blair stared at her as pieces of the recent change in their relationship fell into place. She had been coming in late, avoiding intimacy. “The last two weeks, you spending evenings out…” he didn’t finish blindsided by this sudden realization and she nodded.

“I haven’t cheated on you, if that’s what you’re asking,” she continued. “But I can’t marry you if I love him more.”

Standing, she glanced at the dishes rather than Blair and then at the small apartment that they’d only just begun to furnish with personal items. “I’ll pack my stuff and leave. I told Barry I’d move back in with him after I spoke with you.”

And Blair had watched her go, not trying to stop her. He could blame her for making him upend his life for no reason, but he knew it would be hypocritical to blame her for loving someone else more.

After the break up, Blair had gone on with the day to day stuff mostly to keep his mind from what he had lost when he moved. He would fantasize sometimes that he went to see Jim and the detective made him move back in. Sometimes the fantasies got a lot more steamy but those were just that - fantasies. He knew he couldn’t simply move back in on Jim. The man deserved his privacy. Anyway, he needed to finish the semester at the local college. He had to put in his grades and paperwork. Then maybe, just maybe, he would look for a small place in Cascade, hoping to reestablish the close friendship he had shared with Jim.

He had told Jim that he and Jennifer were having some issues and left it at that. Jim, a divorcee, had suggested counseling. It was something he and Carolyn hadn’t bothered with both realizing that they were not meant to be together but he hoped things would work out better for Blair. When Blair spoke with Jim, he did that once a week, Jim would ask how things were going with them and Blair would say they were still trying to work things out.

Going to the window Blair stared out at the lights of the city. He would finish the semester right before Christmas and though the anthropology department at the college had offered him a job teaching another semester he had turned it down. He was hoping to find a place and job in Cascade by February. He would go back, finish his doctorate, and reconnect with his friends. And, if Jim would have him, take up the mantel of guide.

**Part Two – Jim**

Jim Ellison glanced across the bullpen and mock frowned at Rafe and Henri Brown’s antics. They were teasing Megan Connor, giving her ever more ridiculous stories about the “Major Crimes Christmas Traditions.”

Jim could tell that Megan had long since stopped believing the two detectives before she stood and waving at them walked over to Jim’s desk.

“Have you heard anything from Sandy lately?” she asked and Jim shrugged. He certainly wasn’t going to tell her that Blair was having problems with his fiancée. If Blair wanted her to know that he would tell her. Jim knew Megan talked with Blair on a regular basis.

“He’s finishing up the semester. I know the school was happy with his work and has offered him another term.”

Megan nodded. “I miss him,” she said.

“I miss him too,” Jim admitted. “Who knows, maybe he’ll come visit over the school break.”

“That would be nice. Maybe, you should suggest it.”

“You’re right Connor,” Jim agreed. “I think I’ll give him a call tonight and suggest it.”

Smiling, Megan turned back to work.

It was a day of catching up on paperwork and Jim plodded through it for a couple of hours (wishing Blair was there to help him) and finally, needing a break, stopped and glanced at the phone. Thinking over what Megan had suggested, Jim picked up the phone and dialed Blair’s office.

The phone went straight to voicemail and Jim hung up thoughtfully. He knew classes were over so Blair must be doing something related to grades. He would simply have to call in the evening.

Sitting back and glancing at the phone, Jim frowned considering all his recent calls. Every time he called Blair lately, Jennifer “wasn’t home or she was in the bathroom or working.” Blair hadn’t said they had separated but Jim was beginning to suspect they were. Jim hated the idea of Blair alone and unhappy over Christmas. He’d always had so much Christmas spirit it had infused the entire bullpen with spirit.

Jim glanced at the phone thoughtfully and then looked up the number for Cal Tech. Getting the switchboard operator he asked for Fenton’s office. Jim wasn’t entirely sure what he was going to say when Jennifer picked up but figured he could get clues from her.

“Hello,” she answered and Jim immediately recognized her from all the times she had called Blair at the loft.

“Hello, Jennifer, this is Jim Ellison.”

There was a moment of silence and then Jim heard her sigh. “Hi Jim,” she answered. “I guess Blair told you we broke up.”

Deciding to play along, Jim answered, “I’m sorry things didn’t work out for the two of you. I wanted to wish you happy holidays.”

“That’s nice of you considering.”

“Considering?” Jim asked.

“You know my moving back with my old boyfriend. When I saw Barry, I knew I couldn’t marry Blair.”

Not missing a beat, Jim answered, “These things happen. I wish you a good life.”

“Thanks Jim…and if you talk to Blair, wish him happy holidays for me and tell him I’m sorry how things ended up. He really is a great guy and will make someone very happy.”

Jim considered that statement thinking Blair could make him very happy if only Blair went in for guys. “I will,” Jim promised and hanging up walked over to Simon’s door knocking and entering.

**Part Three – Christmas Eve**

Blair walked into his apartment and reaching over switched on the overhead light before turning to throw the keys in the basket but stopped with a dismal sigh. He had told himself numerous times to get a basket like the one Jim had gotten when he got tired of having to find Blair’s keys around the loft but somehow he couldn’t find the right basket. Actually, he knew where the right basket was, in Cascade.

Taking off his light jacket he threw it over the sofa. He would never say it aloud but he actually missed the cold Cascade weather. It was part of the whole Christmas experience. He had spent some Christmases in warmer climates, mostly with his nomadic mother, but when he moved in with Jim, the whole cold weather experience had become part of the joy of the season.

Moving into the kitchen he opened the refrigerator and looked through the various foods there. Mostly, it was leftover Chinese or Thai food – nothing he really wanted to eat on Christmas Eve.

About to consider ordering in a pizza, he stopped at a knock on the door. He wasn’t expecting anyone so he cautiously opened the door and stopped eyes widening. Jim Ellison stood outside the door.

“Hi Sandburg,” Jim greeted. “Can I come in?”

“Of course,” Blair yanked open the door a big smile on his face. “What are you doing here?”

“I thought I’d visit since I’m off until New Year’s.”

Blair reached over and grabbing Jim hugged him, not at all surprised when Jim returned the hug. He wanted to stay in those arms forever but pulled away and looked up at Jim. “I might as well tell you, Jennifer and I are through.”

“I figured that when she was never around and you were the only one answering the phone. And when I spoke with her yesterday, she mentioned you were separated.”

“You spoke to her yesterday?” Blair asked as he led Jim into the small apartment and indicated Jim should sit on the small couch.

“Yeah, I called to wish her a happy holiday and she mentioned it hadn’t worked out. She told me to tell you she’s sorry. There’s no chance of you two getting back together?” Jim asked.

“No, our breakup is for good.”

“I’m sorry, Chief. I know you cared about her.”

Blair nodded. “Can I get you something?”

“It’s Christmas Eve, I thought we might go out to eat, my treat, and then I’d check into a hotel.”

“Into a hotel, no way man. You’ll stay with me. The place is small but I can sleep on the couch and you can use my bed.”

“I’m not putting you out of your bed, Sandburg.”

“We could share the bed,” Blair said hesitantly. He knew he might be making a mistake offering to share a bed. Jim, desire, and bed – in Blair’s mind it was bad combination, too tempting. “I mean we’ve shared tents before,” he added quickly.

Jim gazed at him and smiled. He wasn’t sure it was the best idea to share a bed with Blair. Blair was just so tempting. “We’ll work something out when we get back. Where should we go to eat?”

“There’s a great Italian place within walking distance,” Blair answered bouncing on the balls of his feet, his step lighter than it had been in the last five months. “We might need to wait to get in since we don’t have a reservation but we could go to the bar and catch up.”

“Sounds like a plan. Let’s go.”

Blair was right about the wait, the maître’d informed them the wait for table would be thirty minutes and so they opted to go sit in the bar until called for their table.

Over a pitcher of beer, Jim asked Blair about future plans. “Are you planning on staying in LA or are you going to come home? You know you can still come back and stay with me.”

Feeling warmth spread through his body and a giant smile brighten his features, Blair glanced down at the table. “I appreciate that Jim but I thought you might want your privacy back.”

“To tell you the truth, Sandburg, the place isn’t the same without you.”

“Really?” Blair’s gaze met Jim’s.

“Really,” Jim confirmed.

“Then I guess I’d like to come back.”

“When can you move back?” Jim asked.

“February, there’s not much to move but I do have to give the landlord a month’s notice.”

“What about the college?”

“I already told them I wouldn’t be coming back.”

Jim nodded and poured them each another glass of beer from the pitcher. “This drink is going to go right to my head,” Blair complained. “I haven’t eaten much today.”

Jim shook his head and lifted his glass clinking it with Blair’s. “Don’t worry. I’ll make sure you get home.”

“And then we can share that big bed,” Blair laughed and wiggled his eyebrows.

Jim considered Blair a moment and then smiled. “Are you making a pass at me, Chief?” Jim asked and Blair suddenly sobered up as he realized what he had suggested.

“I…” he paused but before he could come up with a response, Jim smiled.

“I accept,” Jim answered, leaning close.

“You do?”

“I’m bi, Blair. I’ve wanted you for a long time.”

“I’m bi too and I’ve wanted you forever.”

“Why don’t we get food to go and head back to your place?” Jim suggested. “We can share that bed of yours.”

“This is the best Christmas present I could ever have hoped for,” Blair stood and Jim followed him over to the maitre’d to place a to go order.

**Part Four – Jennifer**

Jennifer made a concerted to straighten her clothes and hair before knocking on the door of apartment 307 at 852 Prospect. Hearing the knock, Blair opened the door and stood looking in surprise at his former fiancée.

“Hi Blair,” she said in a soft voice. “How are you?”

“I’m fine Jennifer, how are you?”

“I’m good,” she answered, indicating the door. “Can I come in?”

“Of course,” Blair opened the door wider and she entered glancing around.

“I guess it was good you were able to move back in with Jim,” she stated and Blair nodded. She turned and looked around the room and then turned back to Blair. “Barry and I, we didn’t work out.”

“I’m sorry to hear that,” Blair answered and she nodded.

“I thought I’d come back and see if we could rekindle something,” she said softly her eyes turning to Blair. But whatever hope she had of working things out with Blair died as he shook his head.

“I’m sorry but I’m seeing someone else now,” he said softly and she nodded sadly turning towards the door.

“Whoever she is, she’s a lucky girl,” Jennifer commented and opened the door just as Jim came down the hall. “Hi Jim,” she offered before turning to the elevator.

“Jennifer,” Jim answered watching as she entered the elevator. When it started down Jim turned back to see Blair standing in the doorway. “What was that about?”

“She was hoping to get back together with me but I told her I’m seeing someone else.”

Jim walked in and closing the door pulled Blair into his arms. “And I’m not crazy enough to ever let you go for someone else.”


End file.
